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The starting point of all
achievement is desire.
Keep this constantly in mind.
Weak desire brings weak results,
just as a small amount of fire makes
a small amount of heat.
The difference between a successful person
and others is not a lack of strength,
not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will.



HABIT never goes
if u remove H
A-BIT remains
If u remove A
BIT remains and
IF u remove B
It still remains.
So my habit of
scrapping u
will never go.




When I was a dog, and
your were a flower
I walked over you and
gave you a shower!!




Ladka shaadi se pehle
SPIDERMAN
Sagai k Samay
SUPERMAN
Shadi k Samay
GENTLEMAN
Shadi k 10 saal baad
WATCHMAN
Shadi k 20 saal baad
DOBERMAN.




Summer Resort-
A place where girls
try to get husbands
and husbands
try to get girls.




The difference between
marriage and death?
Dead people are
free atleast!




Why is a bachelor skinny
and a married man fat?
-The Bachelor comes
home, takes one look at
what's in the refrigerator,
and goes to bed.
-The Married man
comes home,takes one
look at what's in the bed
and goes to refrigerator!




The poor wish to be rich
the rich wish to be happy
the single wish to be
married
and the married
wish to be dead.




Which type of girls
wear transparent dresses?
The girls not having
any confidence on
imagination power
of a man !




Teacher to Bunty:
How old is your father?
Bunty:As old as I am
Teacher: How is that
possible?
Bunty: He became father
only after I was born.




There was a lover
who said that he would go
through hell for her.
They got married-now
he is going through hell !!




The average guy is
much more interested
in a girls Geography
than her History.




A Husband:
There are only two things
about me that my wife
doesnt care about-
(i)Everything I say and
(ii)Everything I do.




Bunty invested 2 lakh
in a business and suffered
a huge loss.
- Do you know
what was the business?
- He opened a
hair cutting saloon
in Punjab!!




Man 2 Chemist:
Mujhe White colour ka
condom dena?
Chemist:White kyon?
MAn:Meri Padosan ka
pati mar gaya hai
mujhe afsos
karne jana hai.




Why do women spend
so much time on
improving their LOOKS
and not their MIND?
Because they know that
men are STUPID
but not BLIND.




Angrez-Hamare yahan
80% shaadiyan
e-mail se hoti hain
Bunty- Kamaal hai!
hamare yahan
100% shaadiyan
female se hoti hain




I'll take bricks and write
"I MISS U" on them
and throw it on ur head
to make u feel,
how much it pains
when "I MISS U"




Cultural difference
between USA & India
In USA u can kiss at any
public place but
cant do SUSU.
In India u can SUSU
at any public place
but cant do KISS




A Judge fined a rapist
Rs. 10,800
When the man asked
why Rs. 10,800?
Judge replied-
10,000 for rape plus
8% entertainment tax.




A Sex expert was asked
whether rape is possible
while running?
No Chance!
Woman can run faster
with her skirt up than a
man with pants down.




Difference between
good girls & bad girls
Good girls open a
few buttons in
hot atmosphere, but
BAd girls open all buttons
to make the
atmosphere hot!




Father on the day of
graduation ceremony
of his son asks him-
What was the
hardest thing u learned
at College?
How to open
Beer bottles with teeth!




Who was the 1st Indian
woman 2 fly abroad?
********
********
********
Sitaji with Raavan.




Man goes 2 medical shop
Man-I need poison
Shopkeeper-I cant sell u
(MAn shows
his wife's Photo)
Shopkeeper- Oh! Sorry!
didnt know
u had a prescription!




For a Pepsi-
Shahrukh Khan,
4 a Fanta-
Rani Mukherjee,
4 a Coke- Aamir Khan,
4 a Thumps up-
Salman Khan,
Chinta mat kar Yaar
Kanche Waali bottle teri




The boy fell in love with
a girl at
second sight
because in first sight
he didnt know that
she was very rich




God made man and
then rested
God made woman and
then no one rested




Aim for the stars
but first aim for their
bodyguards




What is the
thinnest book in the
world?
What Men know
about Women




How Dogs and Women
are alike
Neither believe that
silence is golden
Neither can balance
a checkbook
Both put too much value
on kissing




What is the difference
betwwen a woman and a magnet?
Magnets have a
positive side!




Hello I am a virus and
I am entering your brain
right now.....
sorry,
I will leave,
I cant find a brain!




One out of
four people is a Chinese
if your father,
your mother and
your brother are not
Chinese it must be you
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